22 September 2017

Pain in the morning

It is a pain when someone you need the most isn't there for your tough times. You know you can tackle every obstacles, but to have that person stands along next to you, any obstacle is just a drizzle for you.

I am now realizing, how important it is.. the morning encouragement. The fuel that burns you so you could drive along through out the day. The kiss on the forehead to make you feel protected through out the day. What happens if that person never really there.. he  exists but he isn't.

No appetite for two days. Not even a single comforting word from him either for two days. Maybe he can't sense it, and maybe because a genteel lady doesn't tell..
When you have a partner yet you are still a single fighter.. All you can tell yourself every morning is.. SUCK IT UP.
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09 March 2016

New Year, Better Me

Instead of "New Year. New Me", I'm doing "New Year, Better Me". Grown ups don't leave something that they can't get over, finish what you have started. That is my 2016.

2015, you are an amazing year. People come and go, and left so many life lessons that I can learn and actually apply them in 2016. Blessings on blessings on blessings..

These past few years, I always have something happened before the new years, either something good or bad. This year, it was something that I have always prepared for, disappointment.

"Wish for the best, prepared for the worst"

Something that I was really looking forward into it. Something that I really deep believe in that even makes me pray for it to last longer than I could ever imagine. But none of those worked without blessings from the Mighty God, Allah SWT. *see I'm getting melancholic*

People will want you to do good but never better than them. People expect you to rule, but not lead them. Don't you think this is sad? I do. What's wrong in being good? What's wrong in getting better? Why would you hurt yourself and sacrifice all the things that might have been better? Why so greedy..

Never expect someone to fight for you. The only person who can fight for your own good, your voice, your right, and whatever you stand for is only yourself. Beloved ones? Even them.. not all of them has your best interest at heart. Only you that can help yourself.

I have learnt that if we are only focusing on those people, we'll get stressed because of it. They are crazy, let them be crazy, don't be crazy. Let them be. I know.. I feel you.. If you ever feel what I felt, you might want to stab them right in the eye but where's the excitement? Make them as our introspection, and be thankful that we are far ahead of them.

"The Sudden disappointment of a hope leaves a scar which the ultimate fulfillment of that hope never entirely removes" - Saravine Naitingale
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03 February 2016

Two Decades

Happy Birthday Saravine Naitingale Bonaparte Van Serie! lol

Saravine turns 20 today. Yeay? I guess haha. I didn't upload anything about today anywhere, no facebook, twitter, path, instagram, etc. So I know now who remembered my birthday. It's not a big deal but it was kind of good, my phone didn't blow up like it used to every year. Today was nice and gladly I enjoyed it. 

My day started with me working at my booth at the Jacob K. Javits Convention Center for New York Now Trade Show. Yep, even on my birthday, working is not an option. I made deals and contracts with retailers and wholesalers all over the country. Making money on my birthday yaaass that's the exact thing I should be doing in my 20 right? Then my fellow exhibitors surprised me with cake and stuff, how sweet of them. Then I had to go to my office, because apparently I had hours to work on that day. Then I had two classes until 9 PM. Not your typical birthday, but I am thankful and soooo grateful for today.


7 February 2016
I wasn't planning to have anything for my birthday but I started to think why not. I made my own e-vite, planned the table setting, get the decoration together, deciding what flower that I am going to use. And voilaa..



A celebration of 20 years and appreciation to my friends for being a great people to me and ofcourse everybody :)





I did my up-do hair without rear mirror for the 1st time and I am freaking proud of the result






Don't forget to check out my friend's Ashley Gauthier's vlog of my brunch and also subscribe her! Thanks Ashhhh luv :*

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14 December 2015

Subway Swing 2015

Finals week is around the corner. Homeworks pilled up high, but I got em all done this weekend. I am freaking out yet so calm too haha. I guess I always find my inner peace, and people say it's my forte. This weekend I had bunch of invitations of cool events:

          Friday: New York City Ballet: The Nutcracker at Lincoln Center
          Saturday: The 7th Annual Winter Ball at Academy Mansion
          Sunday: Jazz Age Tea Party at Webster Hall, Subway Swing at New York Museum of Transit

Yes I know it is a lot. I received all VIP passes for these events, but I didn't go because I have my priority straight, like my dad expects me to do, yes dad. But I went to The Nutcracker and Subway Swing! My aunty gave me tickets to the ballet, and I took my friend to go there as my gift too for his birthday hehe It was good and okay, even though I've seen better. I don't mean to brag but you know I'm brutally honest person hehe. My heart melted whenever I hear The Nutcracker Op. 71 No.14 Pas de deux; Sugar Plum Fairy & Cavalier. If you dance ballet, you must know this masterpiece. Dramatic, love it. Enjoyed it too much, I forgot to steal a picture. 

I was dying to go to the Ball & Tea Party, but deadlines were chasing me. I was literally crying. Swing is running in my system. I can dance all night long, just like the flapperettes. I did make it to Subway Swing. It was fun. I love every single thing about it. Dancing on the train while it was running was ah-mazing. I wish I had my partner around..
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